friedchickenugget:

me when i go on vacation

friedchickenugget:

me when i go on vacation

not-cooper:

Doris lived a short but prosperous life

(Source: coopercinno)

(Source: nodaybutlatte)

vinebox:

vinebox:

Y’all on tumblr being broke while I count my bread

image

(Source: vinebox)

(Source: drakemoji)

aobasluttygaki:

don’t use pussy as an insult for the love of christ, a vagina can expand to 500% its size, has strong enough muscles to carry 25 pounds, and contains the only known human organ designed for pleasure and pleasure alone. meanwhile testicle owners sit on their balls wrong and cry.

gnawruto:

foodtrucker:

I manage to turn everything into crap wow

yes that’s called digestion

(Source: foodtrucker)

HOW TO COOK THE CORRECT AMOUNT OF PASTA:

sarcastic-sanity:

1. Pour out how much you think you need.

2. Wrong.